Taking A Baby Step, But Still A Step!

The following story takes place in late 2008. It was somewhat of a catalyst for my social adventures. It was an unexpected innocuous incident that helped increase my confidence and a sign to me that transforming myself from the once geeky, shy kid into a confident individual was possible.


So, I had been trying to amp up things. A day that started horribly quickly turned into the most uplifting days I've had in awhile. The funny thing was, nothing really monumental happened, but I felt good because at least I tried and went after the potential that was sitting there in front of me.

I was going for a job interview. Of course I goofed up the directions and got lost. What's the one thing you must never do at a job interview - be late! Remember that kids. Always give yourself ample time to be there on time. Fortunately, the lady I was meeting with was very forgiving about my tardiness.

So I get there, call the lady and agree to meet her at the Starbucks across the street to avoid going through the amped up security in the building. I found the Starbucks, no problems with that one. I was never a big coffee guy and this whole Starbucks popularity completely escapes me. I've only been in a Starbucks once before in my life - and that was to use the bathroom. Wanting to blend in I went to order something. I didn't know what to order and basically asked the guy for something cold, since I was still stressed from getting lost. I got my iced coffee and took a seat.

Luckily, the place wasn't very crowded, something I was a little concerned with. I didn't feel like having a job interview in the middle of a room of perked up patrons. I take a seat at this counter facing out the window. Four chairs, I took the fourth and in the first I noticed an attractive brunette reading a newspaper. Hmmm…

The lady I was meeting with comes in and immediately recognizes me as her candidate – I guess I looked more out of place than I thought. She sits down in seat number three and we begin talking. She starts telling me about the job and I voice my questions. All the while this is going on I keep sneaking peeks at the newspaper girl. I start thinking about what I could say to her and it really started to distract me. Finally I tried to shut her out and focus on the reason I was there – this interview!

After about forty minutes we wrap things up. It all sounded pretty good and it went well. The end to that part.

Once that was settled my mind started to drift back to newspaper girl, who was still sitting there. I purposely took my time in gathering my things and thanking the lady for her time. I wanted her to walk out, if I was going to try to hit on newspaper girl I didn't want the person I just interviewed with being there and I didn't want to walk out of the place. I know if I did, walking back in a few minutes later would look really weird.

Luckily the lady walked out and I didn't hesitate. Lately I've been watching and reading a lot of these pick-up techniques and advice. There was a time when me and my friends would all be trading tips and borrowing books on the stuff, but in recent years I've just let that fall by the wayside. Plus, realizing I'm pretty much on my own nowadays has helped fuel my motivation to try to meet people. I've been going out on my own with the hopes of seeing some girl and getting enough confidence to talk to her. So I've had that on my mind a lot lately. Once I saw the newspaper girl I knew I would regret it if I didn't try something.

So once I started packing up my things I looked over to her and said something like "I kept wondering what you were reading. You looked very absorbed into that newspaper" or something like that. Honestly, I forget exactly what I said. But it started the ball rolling.

She answered and I explained that I was just having a job interview and about how she kept distracting me. Then an actual social interaction took place involving, how she's waiting for her friend who was also interviewing somewhere, she just graduated from law school, lives out of town, came in for the day, is from France, etc. Her name was Narja, or something unusual like that.

We ended up talking for awhile. I wanted to get out of there before her friend came back. I didn't want to have to try to get her number with her friend standing beside her. Unfortunately, I didn't get her number. I did ask, but she refused, I said ok, wished her a nice time with her friend, said it was nice meeting her and I was gone.

Now, of course this didn't result in a successful hookup or whatever, but I was ecstatic! I was so proud of myself for having the nerve to start talking to her that I didn't care if I got shot down. In the past I would have looked at this cute girl, hope that she would of said something to me and when she didn't sulk out of the place pondering 'what if.....'.

I realized a few things I did wrong, at least according to the pickup videos I've been watching. But I got over a hurdle, something I had never really had done before as sad as it sounds and found out it's not that hard!

This encounter really got me pumped up and optimistic for further adventures and it helped me realize it's not that difficult. The only thing making me feel that way is my mind. It's funny, this girl probably quickly forgot about this interaction and will never have any idea of what an accomplishment it meant to me. Go figure.